A Coach's Diary

The Penn State women's soccer team has been named one of the top 5 soccer programs in the country. They have an environment that engages it's players and where hard work is contagious. A big reason for their success is their three pillars that serve as the glue to their program: the attitude of a champion, blue-collar, and united family. Those core values are at the front of everything that they do, and it leads to connectedness and success on and of the field. When you have a strong foundation, anything is possible. It takes time to truly get the culture that you want, but every day, every practice, and every conversation is an opportunity to strengthen that culture more and more.

Geno Auriemma is one of the best coaches ever. He has built UConn women's into one of the most successful basketball programs ever. He knows a little something about champions and developing championship players and teams. He has excelled at motivating his players to perform at the highest levels. He is always putting his players in the most difficult situations in practice. Doing so pushes them and forces them to perform closer and closer to perfect to find success. He likes to play 5 on 6, 5 on 7, and 5 on 8 in practice. He wants it to be really hard on his players. Whenever they get comfortable with doing something, he makes it harder on them. Some players complain and make excuses, but he said that those players and teams are never going to be any good. The great players and teams welcome the challenge. He is always moving the carrot. Some don't want any part of it. Some keep going. The ones who keep going are the ones who will be champions. PLAYERS: If you want to be great...

Netflix has a new sports documentary called The Playbook . It is a docu-series covering different athletes-turned-coaches and the lessons that they have learned. The first interview was about Doc Rivers. The interview started with Doc telling what he tells his team every year, to start the year: "Every time I walk into the locker room for the first time, I tell my players every year, and I have told them for 21 years, "I'm Doc Rivers, and I'm human, and I am going to make mistakes. Having said that, every decision that I make will be good for the team. That may not be what's good for you, or for me. But if it's good for the team, it's good." He went on to talk about his daily routine of push-ups and sit-ups every morning. He said he has a 30-minute routine, from alarm clock to car, and then he is off to practice. But he doesn't like calling it practice: "When I was young, I practiced every day, but I never called it practice. I hate that. Whe...

In the book, The No Complaining Rule, by Jon Gordon, it talks about the importance of having purposeful, positive interactions with your team. Teams and people are more successful and effective when they are positive, but a lot of us don't have ingrained positive habits, positive actions, and positive thinking in our lives. A positive culture doesn't happen through osmosis. It happens by relentlessly focusing on curating a positive culture and weeding out negativity. The best way to deal with negativity is to create a positive culture where negativity can't breed and grow and survive. Otherwise, you will spend all of your time fighting negativity. Anytime there is a break in communication, leadership, or expectations, it creates a space where negativity can grow. We need intentional, positive leadership, we need positive interactions, and we need positive communication to fill the voids so that negativity can't breed. With my teams and with my family I try to remember ...

"Something good is going to happen to me and through me." I was talking to a friend about how he can be intentional in providing character education for his high school basketball team. One suggestion that I had for him was to create a word of the week or even have his team create a word of the week, and use that word to drive them for the week, while also talking about how they can use that word in the classroom and other parts of life. We decided to start with the word HOPE. With so much going on in the world, we thought it would be important to have, live with, and lead with HOPE. What is HOPE? HOPE is expecting that something good is going to happen to you. When we start a new season, or a new team, or a new week, or a new practice, it would help our performance, mentally and physically, if we had high levels of HOPE. Having hope can make tough situations - practices, games, and classes more bearable. Having hope can keep us motivated to do what we need to do to go after ...

I was watching ESPN and they were talking about a quarterback who was having issues throwing interceptions.  The interviewer said that there are three reasons that a quarterback throws an interception: 1 - You get fooled by what you are seeing. 2 - You panic under pressure and you get rid of the ball before you have too. 3 - You force things or try too hard to make things happen. I started thinking about my own kids and the mistakes that they make in other sports, and this definitely applies to them and applies to other sports. When my daughter is playing basketball or soccer and she turns it over, almost every time the mistake is because of one of those three examples. It really comes down to: 1 - See the play that you want to make. 2 - Relax under pressure, and don't let them speed you up. 3 - Don't force anything; take what the defense gives you. It also comes down to practice and strategy. The more skilled we are, the faster and more efficient we can play. Being skilled and...

Truth and relationships. Those two things will help players grow and develop the most. Players need to know the truth about who they are and who they can be. If they aren’t good enough to start, to shoot more, or to earn more playing time, they need to know the truth about that. They need to know why they aren’t getting as many opportunities as someone else. They also need to know what they can do better to get more chances. Be real with them. If you have a player that is not going to play this year, be willing to be real and honest with them. They have to know where they stand. One of the hardest questions to answer is when a player comes up and they are not good enough, and they ask, “What can I do to play more?” The truthful answer is, “You’re just not good enough.” Most people won’t say that, but we have to be real with them. We have to be able to tell them how important it is to maximize your potential by working as hard as you can, but the reality is, if there are people that...

I know what I needed. I needed a coach who would push me a little more than I wanted to be pushed. I needed a coach who told me why they were pushing me. I needed a coach who saw the potential in me I needed a coach who helped me see the potential in myself. I needed a coach who taught me how to build habits and a mindset that would help me live up to my potential. I needed a coach who was prepared for each practice with a good plan. I needed a coach who was always learning and bringing in new ways to teach. I needed a coach who was inspiring I needed a coach who was fun. I needed a coach who was motivating. I needed a coach who saw more in me than I saw in myself.

What is holding you back? Write down your goals. Write down what is stopping you. Then write down how you are going to overcome those barriers. Know what your enemy is. Know what you are fighting against. Create a plan of action. Create a routine. Create good habits, then master them. Master the little things that keep your habits going, and build on them.

Have you ever had a game where nothing is going good?  When the shots aren't going in? When the passes aren't connecting? When the referee's calls aren't going your way? When the parents are yelling at us and not with us? It is easy to play when everything is going great. But who can play when nothing is going right? Who can we count on to change momentum? Mental Toughness is being able to play the right way and make the right play no matter what is going on around you. Mental Toughness is being able to shoot the right shot even though you missed your first 5 because it is the right shot. Mental Toughness is being able to move on to the next play after each mistake. Mental Toughness is being able to recognize and learn from your mistakes, but still have a positive energy that you need to do better, immediately. Mental Toughness is not allowing a mistake to set you back. Mental Toughness is how quickly you can bounce back. Be mentally tough. It is a skill that can be dev...

One of the issues I have, especially with my own kids, is my expectations are sometimes bigger than the time that I have put in teaching and repping. Some of the biggest frustrations that I have as a dad and coaches when I expect them to be able to do something right away or even worse when I haven't even taught or explained it. It is important to teach and practice. It sounds so simple, but sometimes we need to be reminded of the simple things. And don't forget the practice part. Coaches spend hours teaching certain skills and concepts. It takes time to learn something new. Don't think that we can just tell them something and that they will be able to automatically implement it in the game. Sometimes they can, but a lot of times, it just takes reps and reps to master something.R Repetition is the father of learning. Remember the 10,000 rule. Keep teaching.

Crystal Dunn is a member of the USWNT soccer team. She is really good and starred as a left defender in the last World Cup while shutting down many of the other teams' best attackers. What is really cool about her story is that she was surprisingly cut from the 2015 World Cup. It devasted her to the point where she wanted to quit playing. But she talked in the video below about her mindset coming out of the disappointment and how she bounced back. It is a great lesson on how to handle adversity, moving on, and accepting and embracing life's challenges. PARENTS: It's important to help our kids move in quickly from adversity - whether it is one play in a game or a long-term setback like not making the team. This article here lists a few tips for bouncing back from adversity.

One of the biggest mistakes young athletes make is that they let one play linger on too long in their minds, and it affects their play. We have to be able to move on to the next play. The next play is always the most important play, and if you aren't able to move on to the next play, your game suffers and it hurts your team. Don't let the last play affect you longer than it should. It could be a good play or a bad play. Athletes have to be able to move on to the next play. Nobody really cares about what happened. They need to care about what is happening.  Each new play is a new opportunity to do something special. Don't let the past keep you from doing something special now. Here are 6 questions that you can ask yourself (or your athlete) to help them stay present and in the moment: 1 - What am I doing right now? 2 - What am I supposed to be doing right now? 3 - What is my job? 4 - What is the most important thing to do right now? 5 - Where do I need to be righ...

Being a girl dad and a girl coach, I am often asked what the difference is between coaching girls and boys. My most common answer is that I spend most of my time building up my high school girls' confidence, and I spent most of my time managing my high school boys' confidence. I was always finding ways to get my boys to have more realistic expectations of their abilities, as they would usually overestimate their abilities and performances. I find that I spend an almost equal amount of time building up my girls and getting them to understand how good they are, because they usually underestimate their ability and performance. With the high school boys, they were always thinking that they were better than their individual opponents. In practice and games, they usually have no problem going one on one and breaking away from the team game. We would spend a lot of time watching film breaking down when we took a good shot vs. when we should have passed the ball for a better ...

Your ability (and willingness) to listen, learn, and apply what you coach teaches you is one of the biggest indicators of your future success. The best athletes have talent, but they are also talented learners.  They want to know more.  They want to be better.  They want to learn. They want to grow. Be a sponge. When your coach is talking and teaching, try to soak up all of the knowledge that you can. The more you know, the more tools in your tool box.  Pay attention to all of the little details. Each detail that you master can make you that much better, stronger, faster, and quicker.

How can you be better than the next man if you aren’t better than your previous self?  Use others as measuring sticks but don’t compare, you’re not them! Do something every day to push yourself forward to maximize YOU! • Be consistent with your work: Preparation, Consistency, Mindset, REPS. • Find/Create motivation from within. Work with pride. • Kill the excuses, all of them. Don’t entertain them. Be about it. • Surround yourself with people that have your best interest and will support your journey, even the low moments. • Enjoy the process, the moments. Ride the highs, feel the lows. Balance the two and flow. Get BETTER today.

I was listening to a Joyce Meyer podcast, and she said that if you do these three things and you will find success: 1 - Whatever you do, do it with excellence. 2 - Be a person of integrity. 3 - Keep strife out of your life and your work. Excellence is not perfection. It means you do the best you can with what you have. Make sure that your foundation, roots, and character is strong. Having good, strong character is the first step to sustained success. Being excellent means that you go the extra mile. Don’t just stop at mediocre. Going beyond that. It means that you show up when you are supposed to and do your job – especially when no one is looking. It is important to keep your word. It is important to do what you tell people you are going to do, and it is important to do it to the best of your ability. These three things will help you build the foundation that you need to be great. Master the small things first. You are what you do. You get out if it ...