A Coach's Diary

“Emotions are not reactions to the world; they are your constructions of the world.” - Dr. Lisa Feldman Barrett Do you manage your emotions, or do they manage you? Dr. Barrett is a leading expert on how our brains construct emotions. She wrote, “Emotions are not reactions to the world; they are your constructions of the world,” and, “Human beings are not at the mercy of mythical emotion circuits … we are architects of our own experience.” Her theory is that emotions aren’t automatic reactions — they’re created by your brain based on how it interprets what’s happening around and inside you. Your brain doesn’t just feel happy, sad, or scared automatically. It looks at what’s happening, remembers similar situations, and decides how to feel. That means you can train your brain to have better emotional reactions by noticing your thoughts and choosing more helpful ways to think. Nervous about a test or game? Instead of thinking, “I’m going to fail,” think, “This is a chance to show what I’ve...

  “All of us are a little bit addicted to tomorrow. I'll quit smoking tomorrow, I'll go on a diet tomorrow, I'll lose weight tomorrow, I'll start studying tomorrow. But really, making it happen today is the way you improve.” - Nick Saban Are you waiting for tomorrow? National champion football coach Nick Saban once said, “All of us are a little bit addicted to tomorrow. I'll quit smoking tomorrow, I'll go on a diet tomorrow, I'll lose weight tomorrow, I'll start studying tomorrow. But really, making it happen today is the way you improve.” Many people habitually put things off, thinking change or effort can always happen “later” instead of now out of laziness, ignorance, or fear. But tomorrow will always be tomorrow — never today. Stop relying on “tomorrow” as a safety net. Small, consistent actions today lead to meaningful improvement and growth. Do something today that you’ve been putting off. Question of the Day: What is one thing you’re putting off ...

“Your mind is like a garden. Your thoughts are the seeds. You can grow flowers, or you can grow weeds.” - Dr. Caroline Leaf How would you measure the quality of your thoughts b Dr. Caroline Leaf is a cognitive neuroscientist who focuses on how your thoughts shape your brain structure. She once said, “Your mind is like a garden. Your thoughts are the seeds. You can grow flowers, or you can grow weeds.” Just like a garden, your mind is a space that needs to be cultivated and taken care of. It requires attention, care, and maintenance. Left unattended, it can become overrun with “weeds,” or negative patterns. She also said, “You can literally change the wiring of your brain by changing your thoughts.” Mental habits actively shape your brain. Through practices like reflection, mindfulness, journaling, or cognitive exercises, you can intentionally “weed out” harmful thoughts and “plant” helpful ones, literally changing how your brain responds to life. By paying attention to your thoughts an...

Source:  Well-Oiled Operations Podcast The most valuable lesson I’ve learned this week is the concept of multipliers vs diminishers. Liz Wiseman is a leadership coach who says leaders fall into two broad categories: Multipliers grow, energize and get the best out of others. Diminishers shrink, drain, hold back, and don't get the most out of others (often unintentionally). She says, “The best leaders don’t know everything; they know how to bring out the best in others.” What is a Multiplier? A Multiplier is a leader who brings out the best in others. Instead of relying on their own intelligence or doing everything themselves, they create an environment where people feel engaged, capable, and motivated to contribute. Multipliers amplify the talent, energy, and thinking of the team. Three Things We Can Do to Be Multipliers Fully engage the team. Set clear expectations, show belief in people’s capabilities, and create an environment where individuals feel trusted and challenged to d...

“The best leaders don’t know everything; they know how to bring out the best in others.” - Liz Wiseman Would you rather be the one with all the answers, or the one who helps everyone else play their best? Liz Wiseman is a leadership researcher, executive advisor, and bestselling author who’  core idea is that leaders fall into two broad categories: Multipliers – leaders who make people better and bring out the most in them. Diminishers – leaders who (often unintentionally) drain capability by over-directing, rescuing, or needing to be the smartest person in the room. She once said, “The best leaders don’t know everything; they know how to bring out the best in others.” The best on the team isn’t always the most talented. You can be a great teammate without being the best player. Every team needs a great teammate who makes everyone better. Be that person, no matter where you are on the depth chart. Show up ready, bring great energy, do your job with integrity and excellence, and ...

“I care less about mistakes and I care more about responses. I don’t care about the mistake that got us there. I care about what we’re going to do next.” - Jamie Morrison How do you move on from mistakes? Jamie Morrison is a highly experienced volleyball coach whose international and collegiate coaching successes have elevated Texas A&M’s women’s volleyball program to national prominence, including leading them to their first ever final four. He once said, “I care less about mistakes and I care more about responses. I don’t care about the mistakes that got us there. I care about what we’re going to do next. We talk a lot about mental strength and mental fortitude and the skills that go into that. They're able to be themselves.” One of the hardest things to overcome is a loss of confidence after mistakes or a loss of momentum. He says just like he teaches his team how to pass and set correctly, he teaches his team how to overcome mistakes so they can be themselves in the biggest...

"Put fire into your workout and you burn off worry and frustration!” - Suzanne Yoculan How do you burn off worry and frustration? Suzanne Yoculan is a legendary collegiate gymnastics coach, best known for her extremely successful tenure as head coach of the University of Georgia women’s gymnastics program, where she led the Gym Dogs to 10 NCAA Women’s Gymnastics Championships. Coach Yoculan once said, “Put fire into your workout and you burn off worry and frustration.” We all experience performance pressure, fear of mistakes, stress from expectations, and emotional buildup before big moments, but an intense, purposeful workout can be therapeutic. When we fully engage—mentally and physically—we stop carrying anxiety, self-doubt, and frustration, and effort becomes a release, not just preparation. Learn how to channel your feelings into controlled intensity, use your work ethic as a way to regain confidence, and let your preparation quiet your mind. Energy beats anxiety, preparation...

“Don’t let anyone tell you that being the best and having fun are mutually exclusive.” - Margueritte Bates Can you enjoy the pursuit of greatness? Margueritte Bates became the first-ever rookie head coach to win the NCAA Division I Women’s Soccer Championship when she led the UCLA Bruins to the 2022 national championship. Before that, she was the long-time assistant at Stanford. When talking about her transition from assistant to head coach and her broader philosophy about elite performance, Coach Bates said, “Don’t let anyone tell you that being the best and having fun are mutually exclusive.” If you want to be elite, you don’t have to be rigid, joyless, and exhausting. Of course, being elite requires a lot of hard work, and a lot of it won’t be fun, but is not the enemy of discipline, fun does not mean lack of standards, and positive energy can coexist with — and even fuel — elite execution. So work hard and have fun on your journey towards greatness! Question of the Day: How can yo...

“You have to fight to get what you want, but it’s also important to enjoy what you do.” - Katarina Witt Do you enjoy the chase? German figure skater Katarina Witt was a 2-time Olympic gold medalist and 4-time world champion nicknamed the Queen of Ice. She once said, “You have to fight to get what you want, but it’s also important to enjoy what you do.” Work hard, have fun is a saying I use a lot as a coach. You have to work harder than you know if you want to become a champion, but it’s important to have fun and enjoy the journey too. What does that mean? Success requires effort, discipline, and perseverance. Champions don’t happen by chance; they push through challenges, setbacks, and hard work. While working hard, you shouldn’t lose the joy of the process. Loving the journey keeps you motivated, prevents burnout, and makes the hard work meaningful. You reach your goals faster and sustain success longer when you balance relentless effort with genuine enjoyment. Question of the Day: H...

“Every single person, whether you're on the field, whether you're off the field, whether you're their equipment manager or trainer, whatever you are doing, you have a purpose. And my purpose was to make everybody better.” - Danielle Fotopoulos How do you make the people around you better? Danielle Fotoopoulos scored more goals in women’s college soccer than anyone in history, playing for both SMU and the University of Florida, and she was a part of the 1999 U.S. women's national team that beat China in front of a record crowd in the World Cup finale.  She now coaches, and she once said, “Every single person, whether you're on the field, whether you're off the field, whether you're their equipment manager or trainer, whatever you are doing, you have a purpose. And my purpose was to make everybody better.” You may or may not be the best on your team. You may or may not play a lot. But you do have a purpose, and part of that purpose is to help make the people a...

“You don’t need the most stars, hype, or rankings. You just need discipline, heart, and people who believe in you, and you need to believe in your own abilities. I hope this moment shows you chasing your dreams are worth it, no matter how big or impossible they seem.” - Fernando Mendoza Do you feel like you are being overlooked? Fernando Mendoza led Indiana football to an undefeated season, a Big 10 championship, and won the Heisman Trophy while also being a part of one of the biggest turnarounds in college football history.  During his Heisman speech, Mendoza said, “You don’t need the most stars, hype, or rankings. You just need discipline, heart, and people who believe in you, and you need to believe in your own abilities. I hope this moment shows you chasing your dreams are worth it, no matter how big or impossible they seem.” He shows it truly is not about where you start, but where you finish and what you are willing to do and through to get there. Question of the Day: When y...

“You have to understand that anything in the past takes you out of the present moment. Anything in the future takes you out of the present moment. The competition happens in the present moment.” - Mark Daigneault How do you stay even — not too high and not too low? Mark Daigneault is the head coach of the Oklahoma City Thunder. After getting off to a great start the year after they won the championship, he was asked how they stay consistent. Coach Daigneault said, “You have to understand that anything in the past takes you out of the present moment. Anything in the future takes you out of the present moment. The competition happens in the present moment.” Instead of getting lost in what happened yesterday or worrying about tomorrow, stay focused on today. Ask yourself, “What can I or do I need to do today?”  Then, do that. Question of the Day: What is one thing today that deserves your full focus, without being influenced by yesterday or tomorrow?

“As long as you are green, you will continue to grow. As soon as you are ripe, you will soon be rotten.” - Drew Brees Do you think you know it all already or that you have a lot to learn? Drew Brees is a Super Bowl winning quarterback known for his accuracy, leadership, and preparation. He said his college coach once told him, “As long as you are green, you will continue to grow. As soon as you are ripe, you will soon be rotten.” Green is knowing you are still learning, growing, and developing, and being ripe means you think you’ve arrived or know it all. When you are green, you are curious and constantly finding new things to learn, and when you are ripe, you can be stubborn and stuck in your ways — and that’s when people pass you up and leave you behind. Which one do you want to be? Which kind of person do you want to be around—someone ripe or someone green? Question of the Day: When are you ripe, when are you green, and how can you be more green?

“When you put in the work and you're the hardest worker - sometimes it's ugly, but you just have to stack the days. If you keep showing up and keep working hard, good things are going to happen.” - Sophie Cunningham How do you keep showing up when it’s ugly? Sophie Cunningham is a professional basketball player known for her toughness and hard work. She once said after a game, “When you put in the work and you're the hardest worker - sometimes it's ugly, but you just have to stack the days. If you keep showing up and keep working hard, good things are going to happen." How hard do you work? How hard do you warm up? How hard do you go in the simple drills? Your work ethic is either a competitive advantage or a lid. She then said, “Everyone is going to fail, and I think if you’re not trying or not failing, then you’re not picking yourself hard enough.” Don’t be afraid to fail because greatness is on the other side of failure. Question of the Day: How do you keep sh...

“The first step on the ladder of success is always failure. Prepare for failure. You are going to fail. We all fail. Figure it out. No one will feel sorry for you.” - Kelvin Sampson How well do you handle failure? Kelvin Sampson is an elite basketball coach who has taken multiple teams to Final Fours. He once said, “The first step on the ladder of success is always failure. Prepare for failure. You are going to fail. We all fail. Figure it out. No one will feel sorry for you.” Nobody wants to mess up or fail, but failing is a part of the process. You don’t become successful instead of failing — you become successful because you learn to fail, adjust, and keep going. Very few people start great. Growth begins when things don’t work. Failure isn’t unusual or personal. It’s normal and expected. The people who succeed aren’t the ones who avoid failure—they’re the ones who know how to respond to it. What matters isn't failure — it’s what you do next, and your response to failure is what...