A Coach's Diary

Phil Beckner is a college and professional basketball coach who helped train and develop Damian Lillard in college and worked with the Oklahoma City Thunder when they had Kevin Durant and Russell Westbrook. A few years ago, he interviewed   with Breakthrough Basketball. He talked about what Lillard did to become an NBA star, what the best players in the world have in common, and how he teaches, or tweaks, shooting the basketball. How did Damian Lillard go from unknown to becoming an NBA lottery pick, rookie of the year, and all-star? Damian called me at 11:30 one night and asked, "Phil, what do I have to do to make the NBA?" Beckner told him, "You have to outwork everybody in the country. The guys at Duke, the guys at Kansas - you have to outwork all of them. You have to wake up every single day and not just be the hardest worker at Weber State, but the hardest worker in the country." He said, "Okay, I'll do it," and because he did, he gave himself a c...

Do you ever just sit in your car before going into the house, tired, stress, frustrated, or angry? I have had many of these days, and it seems like those little moments sitting in the driveway with the car running brings me some peace and restoration before going into the house to my most important jobs of being a husband and a dad. After listening to a recent Jon Gordon podcast , I realize that there might be some real benefit to sitting in the car for a few minutes before going in and that it can be a very beneficial form of self-care. Coaching is a tough profession. We pour into and feed into our athletes and their families so much that it is easy to come home feeling depleted, and we often bring our worst home to our own kids and families. We give everyone our best and we give our families whatever little is left. Jon said that we have to make our home team is just as important as our work team, and we have to bring our best self home. He said that the key is to know that most argu...

Damian Lillard was a little known, small college basketball player who became an NBA lottery pick, Rookie of the Year, and an all-star. One of his college coaches and trainers, Phil Beckner was asked in an interview , "What kind of plan did you put in place and that he followed to have that kind of success?" Beckner said that Damian called him at 11:30 one night and asked, "Phil, what do I have to do to make the NBA?" Beckner told him, "You have to outwork everybody in the country. The guys at Duke, the guys at Kansas - you have to outwork all of them. You have to wake up every single day and not just be the hardest worker at Weber State, but the hardest worker in the country." He said, "Okay, I'll do it," and because he did, he gave himself a chance to be special. One strength of Damian is that he has always had a willingness to work on things that he wasn't good at, and he is always willing to work on things that were uncomfortable for ...

One of my resolutions for 2021 is to tap into my spiritual life through this blog. My goal is to post a blog every Sunday that reflects this. The word or thought for this week is ENDURANCE . Endurance is our ability to handle or endure a difficult situation or process without quitting. If 2021 has taught us anything, it is that life isn't easy, and neither is sports. We all face adversity and opposition. The Bible says, "In the world, you will have tribulation." No champion becomes a champion without taking a loss. It took Michael Jordan 7 years to make the NBA finals and to win his first title. The key to success is having the endurance to push through and past all adversity, obstacles, setbacks, and losses. There are some things that we can do to help us build our endurance and that can help us face and overcome adversity. Get Encouragement From Others We can find hope in looking at the journey of others. Find athletes and/or mentors who have done what you want to do an...

Brodrick Thomas has a cool story of how hard work, overcoming adversity, and some luck and blessings can help you reach your dreams. He signed to Division 2 Truman State as an undersized guard, and he had to leave the program after his freshman year because of declining grades. He went to Southwestern Community College for a year, where he helped lead them to an undefeated season and a JUCO national championship. This is also where he grew 4 inches. "At first it was frustrating, not living up to what I know I could have been here academically," Thomas told the Daily Express. "It was frustrating, but when I look back on it, it was big for me because it made me learn what it takes to lead a team, to take a team where it hasn't gone. It was a defining moment and step in my career." Brodrick bounced back, returned to Truman as a leader of the team. He broke scoring records while there, and he impressed his coaches and teammates with his game, his maturity, and his l...

Harrison Barnes was one of the top high school players in the country in Iowa, and he was a big-time recruit before going to UNC. In high school, he played with another future pro, Doug McDermott who played for his dad, Greg, at Creighton before going to the NBA. Coach Greg McDermott said that he attributes a lot of his son's success to Harrison Barnes. Coach McDermott said that Harrison worked harder than any other high school player that he had seen at skill development. Harrison didn't have a drivers license in high school, so Doug was his ride. Doug got to spend a lot of time with Harrison and he embraced the work ethic that Harrison had. They would get up and go run at the track at 5:30 in the morning, and Harrison would be running with parachutes. When Harrison was in the gym, In high school, Harrison Barnes would be in the gym working on one ball-handling skill, just one move, and he would do it over, and over, and over again for 40 minutes - just the same thing. Obvious...

Doug McDermott was a 6-foot, scrawny freshman in high school, and went on to have a great division 1 basketball career, and is now an NBA vet. He was the 6th man as a junior for his high school team, but he embraced his role and did what he had to do for the team. Doug's father coached him in college at Creighton, and he said that growing 6-8 by the time he graduated from college helped Doug have success, but he also said that Doug just continued to get better. He continued to work. He embraced the value of nutrition and getting enough sleep, and he worked extremely hard in the weight room to develop his body. He was a gym rat, but an efficient gym rat. He wouldn't spend hours in the gym working part of the time and screwing around the rest. When he got to the gym, he had a vision in mind of what he wanted to accomplish. He got it done and then he went and enjoyed some of the other things that he likes to do. Have a plan. Follow the plan. Work super hard when nobody is around. ...

Relax. Eyes. Body. Those are the three things that every athlete needs to master when they are in the middle of the action. The first step is to relax. When in the middle of the game, especially in a pressure situation, our brains fight/flight/or freeze mode is activated. For some athletes, that means that they get anxious and move too fast. For some athletes, that means that they freeze and don't react fast enough. For some athletes, that means panic and swing (or kick) away. It takes 10 seconds for the body to process that adrenaline rush that causes us to react, but we don't have 10 seconds in the middle of the moment. Be aware of what mode you dive into under pressure, and work hard to stay centered and focused on the task. One of my kid's default mode is to fight. She gets anxious and rushes the process. My keywords for her are 'relax' or 'breathe.' she needs to take a moment, even in the middle of the action, and center herself so that she can make the...

I mess this up, a lot. I messed this up last night. At basketball practice, my daughter would not see and pass the ball ahead to the open girl. After telling her twice, I stopped practice and had to say it again in front of everybody. The next play, she forced a bad pass to a covered girl across the court, it led to a turnover, and my reaction was terrible. It was one of those moments that keeps me up at night. I can't sleep because I am thinking about how I could have, and should have, responded better. I am not an old-school yeller, but I have high expectations for my athletes, and I try to hold them to it. But, I try to do so in a way that builds them up while holding them accountable. My two biggest fears as a coach are causing them to lose love for the game and causing them to be afraid to take risks. Those two things, love, and courage, are two of the biggest reasons I coach. I want kids to love sports like I learned to love them by having fun and having success, and I want m...

I was reading an article last night from WeAreTeachers.com that made the claim that we are pressuring our kids to read to much, too fast, and too soon, and it made me think about the youth sports world, my own family, and whether or not we put too much pressure on our kids athletically too fast and too soon. The article claims that reading has long been a privilege and a way to pass time and share culture, but it has recently become a forced method of information acquisition.  This made me think of a quote by Kobe Bryant where he said that "Sports used to be something that kids go out and do for fun. But now it’s become so regimented where parents start to inject their own experiences or past failures onto their children, and it just takes the fun out of it.” I have three young daughters who I am trying to teach to love sports, but it is a struggle for me to let go and let them own their experience.  I specifically struggle with how much should I teach and push them...

The reality is, everyone retires from sports, and most people do it without playing professionally and most don't get college scholarships. Knowing this, it is important to keep our athletic experience in perspective. Knowing that we all retire, what do you want to get out of sports? Knowing that we all retire, what do you want your athletes to get out of sports? When I was an athlete, I wanted to be a pro. I wanted to play basketball at North Carolina and then go to the NBA. I learned in high school that it would be hard enough to get a college scholarship to any school, and then in college, I realized that it would be even harder to play pro. But I got out of it what I wanted. I was able to travel around the country playing basketball, I met some great people, and I was able to get my school paid for in the process. I had a great experience that I look back on with pride and joy, I still love sports, and I still love them enough that I choose to share my love of sports with kids....

They might tell us that we weren't good enough, and they might beat us, but they won't say that they didn't 'feel us.' They will feel our fight. They will feel our hunger. They will feel our will to win. They will feel our grit, our determination, and our tenacity. If we make them feel all of that, we will win a lot more than we lose. Most importantly, if we make them feel all of that, we can leave every practice and every game proud of what we did. 1 - Did you work as hard as you could? 2 - What is one thing you were proud of today? 3 - What is one thing that you want to get better at for next time? 4 - How can I help?

The best coaches coach players, not Xs and Os. Don't be so focused on the plays that you ignore the quality of relationships with your athletes. The quality of the relationships that we have with our athletes is as important as anything we can do. They are more important than (almost) any play you can draw up or drill that you can teach. "Culture eats strategy for lunch." Positive relationships help even our best athletes reach their full potential under less stress because we, as humans, are hardwired for relationships and to connect with others. Some neuroscientists  even argue that our need to connect with others is even more basic than food and shelter and is the primary motivation of one’s behavior. At the core of positive relationships is trust. Caring is the way that we generate the trust that builds relationships (CRT and the Brain) . When we intentionally build trust and relationships,  our athletes will be more willing to put themselves ou...

We all have experiences where we get so triggered, so mad, that we blow up on everyone around us. Coaching is such an intense profession, and as much as we talk about relationships and growing people, it is highly driven by wins and losses. Coaching and communicating can lead to miscommunication and unintended conflict. We have this thing in our brains called the amygdala - our brain's guard dog - that stays alert and keeps us safe.  When that kid second-guesses us in the middle of a big timeout, or that athlete talks back in the middle of an important and intense defensive drill, or when that angry parent starts to storm across the court, coming to talk to you about what his daughter didn't play in the final few minutes of a big game, that triggers what many of us call  Fight, Flight or Freeze  mode. That feeling of the hairs rising on the back of your neck, or your body getting hot, or the sudden need to ball up your fist (or the sudden need to run to the locker ...

A big part of coaching is our ability to connect with our athletes and their families. A quote that will stick with me is, "He made me feel seen, heard, and cared for as a learner." As coaches, we can easily change that quote to say, " My coach made me feel seen, heard, and cared for as an athlete, and as a person ." We are wired for connection. We all have different reasons for why we started playing and why we have stayed around the game, but at the foundation of sports is the human need to connect. Our brain's two main goals are to stay safe and be happy. We internally protect our self-worth, our self-determination, our well-being, and our connection to the community. To get our athletes to perform at their best for themselves and for the team, we need our athletes to feel like they are valued members of the team, and we do that by minimizing threats and maximizing well-being. Sometimes, one of the biggest threats to our athletes can be ourselves. We have all...

One of the hardest parts of sports is handling losing streaks! It's so hard to quantify the effect that one basket, one goal, one score, and one point can have on the players, the coaches, and the whole team. We have had games where we played really solid and just didn't make enough shots and lost. We have played games where we played terrible and won. Usually, the locker room after wins and practice the day after wins are so much happier than after losses, no matter how we played. There is a quote that says, "Winning heals everything." No matter how much we tell ourselves that the process is what matters, and play the game - not the scoreboard, and other great quotes that focus on how we play and not the outcome, at the end of the day, winning sure does cure a lot. But sports are a lot about managing moments , and we have to be able to manage, learn from, move on from losses  Cole Anthony just got drafted by the Orlando Magic in the NBA. He went to North Carolina las...

UNC's legendary men's' basketball coach, Roy Williams, says that the toughest part of the transition from high school to college, and the toughest part of transitioning to the highest level in college is the level and consistency of your intensity and your ability to compete. I see this at all levels of athletics. Talent is the great separator, but we all know the quote, "Hard work beats talent when talent doesn't work hard." Even with elite youth athletes, what separates the elite from the really good is the consistency of intensity and competitive levels. The elite are big, strong, and fast, and they keep going. The elite makes second effort plays, and third effort and fourth effort. The elite outlast their opponents.  If you want to take your game to the next level tomorrow, compete longer and harder. Don't give up on the play after you get beat; get it back. And keep doing it over and over again. This will build your stamina, and it will increase your ...

A big part of coaching, and life, is managing moments. It is being present, appreciating and building on the good, and appropriately responding to the bad. Before every game, I tell my athletes that we are going to do some really good things, and we are good to do some bad things. When we do good, let's try to keep that going. When we do bad, let's already make a deal that we are going to move on from it together. It's all about managing those many different moments in the game.  In this video, JPatterson messed up during a recorded filming and Marty Smith just happened to pass by:  Marty shared some kind words that helped JPatterson manage the moment, and future tweets, JPatterson said that he nailed the next take. Know going in that there are going to be ups and downs. Manage the moments in the game. Manage the moments in life. Don't get too high on the highs, and down get too low on the lows.