A Coach's Diary

Practice, weight room, sprints, conditioning, reps on reps on reps. It's definitely hard on the body and on the mental aspect of it.   It's not just about doing it right.  It's about doing it so many times until you just CAN'T GET IT WRONG. It's all about conditioning and reps.  We do a lot of repetitions just to make sure that being on the floor and being tired and being in pain, we will be able to handle it in the biggest moments. Sports are hard.  Sports can be devastating.  Bad things happen in sports.  But bad things happen in life.  Going through adversity helps you learn how do deal with the bad stuff the right way, and how you respond is what makes you a better person, makes a better athlete, and what helps you succeed in life. Whatever you are going through on the court, on the field, or on the mat, you are going to get through it.

You can't have the fruits without having the roots.  You can't expect to be used without being prepared. Fruits are success.  Roots are the work that you put in to get the success that you want.  The more work that you put in, the more success that you get out.  And you can't expect to get what you want - results, playing time, opportunities, wins, etc. - without being prepared and putting the work in. Do the work to get what you want.

When people criticize you - coaches, other players, parents, etc - you can let it hurt your feelings or you can let it motivate you to get better and prove them wrong. It's not healthy to let everything that everyone says about you affect you, and you don't have to try to prove yourself to everyone, but always find ways to motivate yourself and to improve. The Girl At The Gym I was at a gym and I saw this girl and her dad going through basketball drills.  She was obviously very skilled for her age, but these boys (who I assume go to school with her) were giving her a hard time about not using the correct hand on left-hand layups.  I saw her put her head down, and she didn't have the same energy the rest of the workout. After their workout, I overheard their dad say, 'You can't get down about what people say to you.  There will always be people who criticize you.  You have to decide for yourself if that criticism is real.  If the criticism is real, ...

In the video below Brett Ledbetter shows a clip of the movie Whiplash to a group of coaches.  Whiplash is a movie about a young, talented musician and his hard-driving coach who feels like it's his job to do what it takes to get the most out of his students, even to the long-term detriment of the students. They discuss the parallels of this music teacher and many coaches that we see that act as it it's their job to push their athletes as hard as they can to get the most out of them, using fear and intimidation at times, ignoring or ignorant to the long-term damage that they could be doing to their athletes mental health. This leads to a couple of great speeches by Dr. Jim Loehr, a leading sports psychologist who teaches and encourages coaches to have the right mission as they lead young athletes  We Hold Their Dreams in Our Hands It's so important for coaches to understand the extraordinary power you have in the lives of athletes that you interact with....

Jon Gordon recently did a great podcast with author and popular speaker Molly Fletcher.  Fletcher recently released a book called The Energy Clock that teaches you how to create a life full of energy by aligning our energy and time to what matters to you the most. Molly Fletcher was once a high-power sports agent.  Her job and life was very busy, but she said that during a lunch with her parents where her phone kept blowing up with the calls of professional athletes and coaches, she realized the importance of being present and in the moment with the ones that you love and knowing how to shut off your job when you need to. Her parents came into town, and they went to an 'awesome place for lunch.'  She said that from the time they sat down, her phone wouldn't stop ringing.  Instead of letting those calls go to voicemail so that she could enjoy time with her parents, she answered every call. Her mom asked her a powerful question, "What do they want?"...

Every day this week, spend time working on your game outside of practice. Everyday. If there is something that you are struggling with at practice, practice that at home. Don't be the same player with the same struggles next week that you are today. PLAYERS:  Every practice, your coach teaches you something new or you work on something.  In between practices, work on what you were taught so that you are better at the next practice.  This is how you get better; by working on your game on your own. PLAYERS:  Learn from your games too.  If there is something that you struggle with in games or something that you don't understand or something that you want to do better, practice it.  If you lose the ball in certain spots, miss certain shots, or don't feel comfortable at certain times, work on those skills and situations on your own in between games. PARENTS:  Watch your kid at practice and during games so that you can prov...

I am short, my wife is short, and our basketball playing daughter(s) are short.  Instead of running from it, we embrace it.  We tell our daughters now that they will never be the biggest or tallest on the court, so they have to be the toughest, smartest, hardest working kids on the court.  There are some things that we just can't help, and genetics is one of them.  But we don't have to allow things like size hold us back. There are smaller players at every level of all sports having success, but it takes a different level of character and commitment when you are undersized to compete at the highest levels. I was once at a high school basketball game where an assistant basketball coach from the University of Arizona was recruiting a smaller guard, and I asked him about the athlete's ability to play at the next level.  Here is a summary of his response on what it takes for a smaller guard to play at the highest level of college basketball: "To be unde...

TRUST .  100% trust.  "I need to make sure that you will catch me when I fall.  That is what bonds people; you didn't let me get hurt.  From then on, we are going to have this bond because I know you will catch me and you will protect me, and I feel secure." When you become that close, it becomes a family, and it makes that bond even stronger, and that is what makes a team so awesome.  But if the chemistry of the team is not there, and the trust and the bond isn't strong, then that is when things start to fall apart  Placing your trust in others can be scary, but you have to learn how to trust your teammates and you have to be worthy of being trusted. Trust is what makes teams special, and teams are what makes this sport experience special.

Change from 'Have To' to 'Want To' Have to come early. Have to stay late. Have to get more shots. Have to get more touches. Have to have more energy and enthusiasm. Have to get back on defense. Have to dive on the floor. Have to touch that line. Have to talk to your teammates. Have to be a great teammate. Want to come early. Want to stay late. Want to get more shots. Want to get more touches. Want to have more energy and enthusiasm. Want to get back on defense. Want to dive on the floor. Want to touch that line. Want to talk to your teammates. Want to be a great teammate. Changing from 'Have To' to 'Want To' can completely change your life.  It's all about perception and how you look at everything.  If you look at everything as a burden, then everything will bring you down. If you look at everything like an opportunity, then everything is an opportunity for you to get better, do bet...

PLAYERS:  If you aren't getting the opportunities that you want, one of the first things that you should ask yourself is, "Can my coach trust me to do my job more than the person who is getting those opportunities?" If you truly feel like you can be trusted to get the job done, keep working hard and take advantage of your opportunities when they come.  Your time will come, and when it does, play so well that the coach CAN'T take you off the court or field. Tom Brady was the 199th pick and a back-up until Drew Bledsoe got hurt.  Tom Brady played so well that he kept the job for 19 years and won 6 Super Bowls.  If you can play, you will get your chance and you have to take full advantage of it to stay on the court. If you feel like there are things you need to work on to gain that trust, then put the time and the work in.  Be more consistent with your decision making.  Be a more consistent shooter.  Be more consistent giving your best eff...

COACHES:  One of our most important jobs is to use sports to develop great people.  We have to see, grow, and develop the person first and the player second.  We have to make sure that our kids know that we care more about who they are and the person that they are becoming more than the athlete. When we do this, we teach them to value character over performance and we can help them grow into healthy adults.  Plus, an athlete with better character will be a better athlete because they will work harder and they will work smarter and they will do it with more grit. Dr. Jim Loehr has a great quote.  He says that "Who you become as a result of the chase is the most important thing." Sports allow us to become a better version of ourselves, and the pressure part of sports is just another way for us to grow and find out more about ourselves. Dr. Loehr asked Billy Donovan a powerful question.  He asked,  "What is your purpose of coaching, and ...

ATHLETES:  The best way to prepare for the games is to have great practices.  But we also need to look at what we are doing between practices too. There is only so much improving that can come from a few practices a week, and much of a coach's responsibility is to get the TEAM ready to perform together. The best coaches find ways to get the TEAM ready while also growing individual players through player development, but there is only so much time that can be spent on player development. If you want to be the best that you can be, you have to put in extra practice between practices.  Pay attention to what your coach teaches in practice and your role.  Pay attention to the drills that you do.  Ask your coach what you need to work on individually, and practice all of that on your own. On off days, get extra reps in.  Find ways to come early to practice or stay late after practice to get extra work in. Your growth and development is up ...

The video below is the third part of a great conversation between Billy Donovan and Brett Ledbetter at What Drives Winning. They talk about our legacies as coaches, how we are planting seeds in our athletes, and how to find freedom in our purpose as coaches. Planting Seeds The hardest thing in coaching is that we are always planting seeds in players, but sometimes those seeds don't sprout and take bloom until long after they are gone. And the frustrating part as coaches is that we want that plant to flower and to harvest right now while we have them, but sometimes that harvest happens at different times in people's lives. We have to keep planting knowing that our legacy is ultimately the lessons that we teach our players, what they remember about us, and what they say about us long after we are gone.   Our legacy is more than wins and losses.  Our legacies are the people that our athletes become as they grow up and start their own lives and...

Doing what it takes to achieve sustained excellence in sports and in life is not normal.  By human nature, we are lazy, self-centered, and seek instant gratification.  We want the cookie, we don't want to do the extra sprint or touch the line, we want to take a break, we want to watch that extra episode on Netflix. But to be great, we have to fight the urge of human nature.  To be great, we have to wake up every morning knowing that greatness is often a battle between who we want to be and our human nature, and to be great coaches, we have to know that our athletes are battling the same issues. When I was playing in college, we had to do times miles.  One run, I had to run the mile under 5:50. I crossed the line right at 5:50. The whole next week, I had to do morning work because I didn't make it in UNDER 5:50.   My coach taught me a very valuable lesson that day.  He taught me that good wasn't good enough.  I wasn't happy about i...

Over the years, one of the hardest conversations come from parents concerned about their kid not playing.  Their kid is a great, hardworking kid who loves [insert the sport].  All they want to do is play, and they can't wait to play varsity [insert the sport].  But now they are a Freshman on the Freshman team or a Sophomore on the JV team, or they have finally made the varsity, but it's not what they envisioned for themselves.  Instead of being a starter, they come off the bench.  Instead of getting equal playing time, they are only playing a few minutes here and there.  Instead of coming home excited every day after practice, they come up feeling dejected and rejected and they are starting to lose their love for the game. Parents are genuinely concerned.  This is the first time that their athlete has been down and depressed about the sport that they love, and they genuinely don't know what to do for their athlete.  Their athlete has always...

In the video below, former Florida basketball coach and current Oklahoma City Thunder coach Billy Donovan says that the best teams that he has coached have had 3 characteristics: 1 - Love 2 - Care 3 - Acceptance He said that his players on his best teams had a love for eachother, they cared about eachother, and they accepted eachother. He would often have players come to his house for team dinners, and one of his players mentioned how lucky coach was to have such a loving, caring, and accepting family.  Coach Donovan told his players that his family isnt't perfect, but that they are COMMITTED to trying to be the best that they can for eachother. None of us are perfect.  Our teammates won't always get along.  There will be fights.  There will be arguments.  But if we can be committed to showing eachother love, care, and acceptance, we can create a memorable experience and we can maximize our abilities as a group.

The bottom two thoughts are from Jon Gordon's interview with Craig Ballantyne on Jon Gordon's Positive U podcast. Change Your Identity First With the new year here, so many people are creating New Years resolutions that so often don't work.  But James Clear has a different approach that might be more effective.   This New Year, change your identity first.  Figure out who you want to be and start living like that person would live.  If you want to be a more successful coach, identify and act like a coach with the type of habits and success that you seek. If you want to be a starter, start acting, thinking and living like a starter.   If we look at ourselves like we are the person that we want to be, then we won't need to rely as much on discipline and will power for how to act - it's just how we act and how we do things. If you want to change anything in your life, change your mindset and truly believe that you a...