A Coach's Diary

Competition can bring out the best in people and the worst in people. Everyone loves a good rivalry because it's intense and exciting.  Great opponents bring the best out of us. They push us harder and farther than we can push ourselves. They force us to rise to the occasion. It is important to appreciate and respect our opponents because they push us to be the best that we can be. And it's important to remember that even in the middle of the toughest battles if you are a follower of Jesus, and to do as Jesus did. You can be the fiercest competitor and still be a good person. BE A GOOD PERSON AND DO GOOD THINGS Goodness is defined as the quality of being morally good or virtuous, but goodness  is more than being a nice, kind, and polite model citizen. Goodness is an excellence of character that actively and intentionally works from the inside out and is seen and felt by everyone that you come in contact with. Goodness is about being a good person, but it is also about being a ...

At the end of a conference basketball game, Michigan head coach Juwan Howard and Wisconsin head coach Greg Gard walked towards each other, seemingly to give a post-game handshake. When Coach Howard walked close to Coach Gard in the handshake line, Coach Howard said something and continued to walk by. Coach Gard then grabbed Coach Howard, and he stood in his way, not allowing him to keep walking. They grabbed each other, exchanged words, and Coach Howard put his finger in Coach Gard’s face. The other coaches, players, and police tried to get in between the two coaches, but the situation continued to escalate until Coach Howard slapped one of Wisconsin’s assistant coaches. Sports are intense, and at that level, millions of dollars are on the line. It is easy to understand how two competitors can get so intense. We teach our athletes to play through the final buzzer, so we have to coach them through the final buzzer. Sometimes that coaching leads to disagreements and frustration, but as l...

Great teams need great teammates. A great teammate makes the team and the locker room better because they bring positive energy, and because they encourage, motivate, and build up their teammates (1 Thessalonians 5:11). A great teammate is also kind. A great teammate is tough and competitive, but they are kind and make their teammates feel like they belong, valued, and safe. Kindness is serving and blessing others so that you can contribute to their joy, peace, and happiness. Kindness is a lifestyle, a choice, and a daily practice. BEING A GREAT TEAMMATE should be a goal of every athlete playing team sports and the goal of every parent for their young athletes.  One of the positive side effects of team sports is learning how to work with and compete with others.  This is a skill that will stick with you for the rest of your life. Make it a goal to be the BEST teammate on the team.  Make it a goal to bring positive energy to every practice and every game.  Make it a g...

Motivational speaker  Jim Rohn  once said that we are the average of the five people we spend the most time with. Research shows that our relationships are the greatest indicator of success, well-being, and happiness. The strengths of our relationship are a greater success indicator than wealth and fame.  People who are deeply connected to someone or to a group or community but have unhealthy habits (like smoking and alcohol) consistently outlive people who have extremely healthy habits but are not relationally connected to  any group. T he quality of your life is always going to be a direct reflection of the quality of your relationships. We are all born with the need for relationships and strong social connections. Great relationships help us feel happier, more hopeful, and healthier. Who are you connected to? I heard a preacher once say that the life and relationships of Jesus are a great example of the relationships we should seek. Everywhere Jesus went, large cr...

Usain Bolt is the fastest man who ever lived. He holds the world records in both the 100m and 200m sprints, and he is also a part of the fastest 4x100 team ever. It takes vision, purpose, and grit to spend 4 years training for a 9-second race, especially in a world where patience is lacking and when people who don't see results after a month or two give up and quit. Without vision, the people will perish. 4 years is a long time to train for such a short race. Your vision is what keeps you inspired and motivated to keep training when you don't want to or don't feel like it. Purpose is why we do what we do. Usain Bolt's purpose was to become the fastest man in the world. Knowing what he wanted to do and why he wanted to do it helped keep him focused through the 4-year journey and grind. Having a meaningful purpose can help you stay focused on the things that matter most to you, it helps prioritize your life, and it helps you walk away from things that don't serve your...

People may forget what you said and they may forget what you did, but people won't forget how you made them feel. Derek Jeter is one of the best baseball players ever. He was a hall of fame captain and shortstop for the Yankees for 20 years and won 5 World Series. He was asked on a podcast , "Which coach had the most influence and impact on you and your game?" Without hesitation, Jeter answered, "Joe Torre." He said that Coach Torre was the best communicator he has ever known. Jeter also said that Coach Torre didn't treat everyone the same, but he treated everyone fairly. Everyone has a different personality, and we have to meet people where they are and give them what they need if we want to help them become successful. Jeter also said that Coach Torre had a calming influence that a young player needs. Young players are going to mess up, and when they do, the first thing that they look at is their coach. They want to see what their coach is doing and how he...

I am always nervous when I am the new guy. When I join a new team, even as a coach, I get nervous. I start to question myself and ask questions in my mind like, "Will I be good enough," "Will they like me," and "Do I have what it takes?" I have learned about the value of talking to myself instead of listening to myself. When I listen to myself, I hear a lot of negative thoughts, fears, and worries and every reason why I won't be good enough, why they won't like me, and why I don't have what it takes. When I talk to myself, I control the story being told in my head. I can feed myself with the words and encouragement that I need to be successful. CHOOSE TO FEED YOURSELF WITH POSITIVE THOUGHTS AND YOU WILL HAVE A POSITIVE ATTITUDE AND A POSITIVE LIFE Kobe Bryant has some great advice for someone new to a team. He was asked in an interview, "Do you have any advice for somebody joining a new team or for the newest or youngest person on a new te...

I go into almost every game nervous. That is who I am. It used to really bother me, then I learned that being nervous is normal and natural. It means that I care about what I am doing. It made me feel even better when I found out that the great Michael Jordan got nervous before games. When he was asked if he got scared before games, Michael said that he is never scared to do things on the basketball court, but he gets nervous because of the challenges that come from playing. MJ says that he has total confidence in his skills and his skills get him comfortable when the game starts, but he is said that he is nervous at the start of pretty much every game. It is okay to be nervous. Even the best athletes in the world get nervous. We have to find ways to play through our nerves and fear. Babe Ruth once said,  "Never let the fear of striking out get in your way."  Bear Grylls is known for presenting wilderness TV shows in the UK and the US. He said,  "Being brave isn't th...

What do you do when your students or athletes don’t act or respond how you want them to? What do you do when they aren’t living up to your expectations? What do you do when you need to discipline them or redirect them? In our school district, we are learning about Restorative Practices and the power of community building and relationship restoring circles. Restorative practices are a process designed to build and sustain meaningful relationships, and to restore the relationship when it is harmed or damaged. Frank Martin is an old-school basketball coach, meaning he is tough and disciplined. But even a no-nonsense, old-school coach like Coach Martin can see the importance of being what our kids need, and the importance of teaching, teaching, teaching. When I was a kid, when you did something wrong, the coach would yell at you and make you run. They would yell at you and run you until you learned your lesson, or until he lost his voice.  You can’t get away with that today. Today’s ki...