How Do You Make Them Feel?

People may forget what you said and they may forget what you did, but people won't forget how you made them feel.

Derek Jeter is one of the best baseball players ever. He was a hall of fame captain and shortstop for the Yankees for 20 years and won 5 World Series. He was asked on a podcast, "Which coach had the most influence and impact on you and your game?"

Without hesitation, Jeter answered, "Joe Torre." He said that Coach Torre was the best communicator he has ever known. Jeter also said that Coach Torre didn't treat everyone the same, but he treated everyone fairly. Everyone has a different personality, and we have to meet people where they are and give them what they need if we want to help them become successful.

Jeter also said that Coach Torre had a calming influence that a young player needs. Young players are going to mess up, and when they do, the first thing that they look at is their coach. They want to see what their coach is doing and how he will react. When Jeter would look at Coach Torre, he was always calm, and it made him feel as though he believed in and trusted him.

Our kids will make mistakes. Mistakes are an important part of the learning process. When your kids mess up, how do you make them feel? Do you make them feel more scared or confused, or do you help them feel confident?

How you respond to their mistakes will greatly impact how they learn, grow, and act moving forward.

I can't remember how many points I scored when I played. I don't remember the records of my teams. But I do remember the meaningful moments - positive and negative - and I do remember how my teammates and coaches made me feel.

Those feelings have greatly influenced who I am today, and how we make our students and athletes feel will greatly influence who they are tomorrow.