When I was an younger athlete, one of my biggest flaws was that I would get frustrated easily, and when I got frustrated, it showed on my face and through my body language. I had to learn how to manage frustration appropriately, and that meant I had to learn to how change my relationship with frustration.
You can learn to see frustration as your enemy or your friend. Frustration is like the “check engine” light in your car. Nobody wants to see it come on, but it lets you know that something isn’t right.
Frustration can be the result of your inability to do something, failed expectations, or many other things.
In his book Relational Intelligence, Dharius Daniels writes that our emotions are messengers; they vocalize the inner workings in our souls. They are our body and soul’s way of alerting us and telling that there is something we need to pay attention to.
When you feel frustrated, Daniels says to ask yourself:
- Why?
- What am I expecting that isn’t being met?
- Do I feel drained?
- What am I feeling?
- Why am I feeling it?
- What is missing that I need?
Reflection is an essential part of success. You have to be willing to stop and press pause when necessary and be honest about what you are thinking and feeling, and then evaluate whether or not you are living the life you want to live and becoming the athlete or person you want to be.
Through reflection, we learn how to figure out what is right, what is wrong, and what adjustments we need to make. Frustration is the signal that says something isn’t right, and reflection is what begins the process of making things right.
When you feel frustrated, stop and take a second to reflect on why and see what adjustments you need to make.
Start on the inside and work your way out.
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