A Coach's Diary

Even the great Michael Jordan said there were a lot of doubters when he was trying to pick schools, but his dad pushed him to go to North Carolina. It's important to have people in our corner who believe in us more than we believe in ourselves sometimes. Jordan said Coach Dean Smith, the legendary North Carolina basketball coach, would challenge you mentally. He made you think. He never cursed, he kept you humble, and he gave you confidence by giving you compliments when he thought you needed it. Jordan said he was afraid of Coach Smith because Coach Smith was a huge name in North Carolina. He said that it was intimidating the way that he controlled practice. Every minute was thought out and he was very demanding. When Jordan got to North Carolina as a freshman, there had only been four freshman starters. His goal was just to get on the court and make an impact. He said,  "I am listening to what the coaches want, and I'm competing my butt off. I'm trying to impress all...

  TRUST “With anything that you are dealing with, pray, trust God, and stay busy being a blessing to others.” I always tell my players, “If you want to play more, I have to be able to TRUST you more. I have to be able to TRUST that you can execute what we do and teach in practice. I have to be able to TRUST that you will show up to practice and games ready to work and ready to compete. I have to be able to TRUST that you will be able to fight through the adversity that WILL come.” As athletes, we have to TRUST ourselves and the work that we put in. Every practice and every game, we are going to do some good things and we are going to do some bad things. No matter what, we have to TRUST that we can bounce back and do and execute what we have worked on. You have to believe in yourself and you have to TRUST yourself. That TRUST comes from putting time working on your game. The more you work and the harder you work, the more consistent you will become and the more you can TRUST yoursel...

Have you ever tried coaching your athletes hard and they give you attitude or shut down on you? It is frustrating when I can't coach my athletes the way that I need to coach them, and sometimes I don't understand why they won't let me teach them the way that I need to teach them without shutting down. But the NCAA transfer portal is one of many indicators that let us know how important it is to think about the way we communicate to our athletes in today's world. One simple thing that I have learned to do is sandwich the meat of the conversation - the hard stuff - between the positive stuff. As often as I can, I try to sandwich my coaching and criticism between positive comments. It helps. At the end of many practices, I do let my athletes know that many coaches in their lives won't be as nice in the way that they deliver their messages, and they have to learn how to find the message in the coaching, criticism, or yelling so that they are prepared for different coach...

This isn't sports-related, but it is. I have seen many high school and college freshmen struggle when they stepped up to a new, tougher stage. We see and celebrate the Mal Pugh's, Luka Doncic's, and Naomi Osaka's of the sports world and marvel at how they can be so dominant so early. But we don't always notice the growth of someone like Dana Evans, the star basketball player at Louisville who came off the bench her first two years before becoming the ACC player of the year as a junior. She was an All-American in high school, but she struggled her first year of college to earn meaningful playing time. She didn't quit and she didn't transfer. She learned, she grinded and she kept getting better. Leveling up is hard for everyone. Stay curious and stay persistent.

Mia Hamm is one of the best soccer players to ever play, and she played for one of the best coaches and in one of the best college programs in the history of the sport when she played for coach Anson Dorrance at the University of North Carolina. When she was at North Carolina, they won four consecutive National Championships, and her team only lost one game of the 95 that she played on the team. You don't become the best without hard work. Coach Dorrance says, "The final measure of athletic greatness is not what you do in the training sessions with your peers and teammates - it's what you do on your own." In the video below, Coach Dorra nce shares his favorite story about Mia. He was driving to campus one day during Mia's senior year early on a cold, late winter morning. He said he stopped and saw Mia going through their grueling fitness exercise alone in a cold park. She was running through a cone drill where she had to sprint 5 yards and back, 10 yards, 15, 20, ...

Have you ever had an athlete whose default mode when learning something new and difficult was to shut down? I have had a couple like that. They would just shut down, pout, and sometimes cry and quit when they would have to learn something new or practice something that they weren't good at. It was a lack of confidence and a feeling of hopelessness that was equally sad and frustrating as a coach. We know and try to communicate that the path to getting better is filled with obstacles and failures and misses. These athletes didn't want any part of the failure process that is necessary to get better. So, what do you do with these athletes? I was reading a book called, "Building a Bridge from "I Can't to I Did.'" They named this 'Learned Helplessness.' Learned helplessness is when an athlete believes that they have no control over their ability to improve and master something. Every great athlete needs self-efficacy - the belief that they have the abi...

The story of Michael Jordan not making the varsity team when he was a sophomore is a well-known story in the sports world. Jordan said that the team was already stacked, but he felt like he was good enough to contribute. He had to play JV all season, and even after averaging 26 or 27 points a game, Coach Pop Herring still didn't move him up to the varsity when the JV season ended like he had done for other JV players in the past. Instead of transferring or quitting, MJ just kept pushing and working. He was allowed to travel to the varsity games, but he had to either pay for a ticket or carry the jerseys to get in the games. COACH HERRING WAS THE FIRST ONE TO SEE IN ME  WHAT I SAW IN MYSELF. Over the course of the season, MJ would work out with his coach every morning at 6:30. They would work on shooting, ball-handling, and play 1 on 1 for an hour before school. MJ's coach made a big poster with all of the drills listed, and they would go through them every day. He said that mos...

LOVE “Follow God’s example, therefore, as dearly loved children and walk in the way of love , just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.” The best team s have great teammates. Great teammates care about each other. Great teammates love each other. Great teammates support, encourage, and inspire each other. Ephesians 5:2 says that we should walk in love as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us. We should love the people around us, we should look to serve the people around, us, and we should look for ways to help the people around us look better, feel better, do better, and be better. These are some qualities of great teammates:  They bring out the best in each other. They support each other. They inspire and encourage each other. They help each person meet their needs. They go out of their way to help and support one another. They are happy when one of their teammates do well. They show a teammate who failed that they are sti...

The Curse of Perfectionism is when you think you need to be perfect at something, and when you allow that thinking to hold you back from taking risks and trying new things because you are nervous or afraid you are going to mess up or fail (or miss a shot). I knew a basketball player that was afraid to shoot because he was afraid of missing. He let The Curse of Perfectionism keep him from taking good shots in practice and games. Even though I told him over and over again that most players miss most of the shots that they shoot, he was still so worried about missing that he wouldn't shoot. When he would shoot and miss, he would put his head down and lose his confidence. We had to work hard to create a growth mindset and learning environment where we maintained high expectations while letting everyone know that mistakes are a part of the learning process. We were open and honest in saying that the best learn quickly from their mistakes so that they don't repeat them over and over ...

I once knew a soccer player who was one of the greatest goal scorers I had ever seen. Mariah's team could always rely on her to get a goal or two. Even in the biggest games against the best teams, her team could count on her to make sure that they walked away with one more goal than their opponent. But the most impressive game that I ever saw Mariah play was in a state championship game in high school. It wasn't impressive because she played a great game, it was impressive because she struggled all game but never quit. In this game, Mariah was matched up against a big, physical, and fast defender. It seemed like she was knocked off her ball every time he touched it. She couldn't get anything going, she couldn't do anything right, and she couldn't beat this defender. But Mariah kept moving, she kept working, and she kept asking for the ball. She never stopped. You could tell she was frustrated, but she just kept pushing through. With a few minutes left in a 0-0 game,...

"Today, players receive the rewards before they prove their worth, if you look around, you'll see that it happens in a lot of places, not just sports." - Michael Jordan Michael Jordan was asked years ago if there would be another Michael Jordan. He said yes, but it would be harder. He said that it would be harder because players are given a lot before they have proven themselves. Today, players can be known around the world while still in high school. Jordan said that he always wanted to prove what he could do, and even though he was the 3rd pick in the NBA draft, the established players like Larry Bird, Magic Johnson, and Dr. J were the clear stars. When my play started providing me with rewards, then I wanted to prove I deserved them. I never felt the desire to rest on what I had accomplished. I never felt like I deserved to drive a Bentley when I got my first contract, or live in a mansion. Those things might be symbols of success, but a lot of people confuse symbols w...

  ARMOR “Be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes.” Have you ever tried on everything in your closet looking for the right thing to wear? When you look good, you feel good. When you feel good, you play good. Some people crawl out of bed ready to play in whatever jersey their coach lays out without worrying about their accessories. Some people stress over what shoes they are going to wear, the color of their socks, whether they are going to wear knee pads today or not, undershirt or no undershirt, and what about a headband? We want to step into the game feeling good, and part of that is putting on clothes and gear that we feel comfortable and confident in. God provides us with a uniform that can help us fight the devil, depression, anxiety, stress, and all other evil forces that go against the fruits of the Spirit. It is called the armor of God and we have the ability to put it on every da...

Great teams are teams that have coaches who are truth-tellers and players who can listen, take coaching and criticism, and use it to help them be and play better. There is a team in Texas that was known for having a lot of talent, but they were never able to put it all together to create successful, winning seasons. When they were on, they were on. But when adversity hit, they would start to fight with each other by pointing fingers and blaming others for mistakes. Coach Rod was ready for a change, so he read Jon Gordon's book, the Power of a Positive Team. Toward the end of the book, a story about Pete Caroll and his time coaching the USC football team stood out and inspired him. When Carroll was at USC, the Trojans enjoyed an amazing run of success that included a record of 97-19 and winning the 2003 and 2004 AP National Championships. Carroll created "Tell-The-Truth Mondays." The team would get together on Monday's after their game and talk about what they did wron...

One of the reasons that I love coaching kids is because I know the importance of that first practice, that first season, and that first experience. That first season is a great opportunity to build a foundation of love and fundamentals that can lead to a lifetime relationship between a kid and a ball. But that first season can also be the last if we don't handle it right, and what could have been a beautiful relationship might end before it ever gets the chance to get started. That is why this quote is so important to me. Everyone has to start somewhere. It starts with airballs, travels, and double dribbles. It starts with missed tackles and running to the wrong end zone. It starts with running from the ball and not to the ball. It starts with misses, strikeouts, and stumbles. But if done right, it also starts with smiles, fun, and friendship while teaching the basics and building off of them. And the beauty of this quote is that the misses and mistakes never really stop. Michael J...