The Big Game Flu

I walked into the coach's office, and one of the football coaches was sitting at his desk with his head down. I ask him what was wrong, and he said that the 'Big Game Flu' was running through his team.

I asked him what the 'Big Game Flu' was, and he said that some seasons, when his team was having an average or below-average season without a lot of leadership and lacking in grit, many of his players would end up hurt when they would play the top teams in their district, only to be healthy the next week against a weaker opponent. Their coaching staff, noticing this trend happening the week of the big game, started calling this phenomenon the 'Big Game Flu.'

He said that the 'Big Game Flu' doesn't run through their team every year. The years where they have strong leadership, when their athletes are mentally tough and have grit, and when he has athletes who truly love to play the game and play with and for each other, the big game weeks are the best weeks.

But seasons and teams like they have right now are tough, and when it gets tough with groups like he has right now, the 'Big Game Flu' strikes fast, strong, and hard.

The craziest thing about this year's group is that they have a legitimate chance to make the playoffs. They could lose the big game and still make it in, but that doesn't stop the 'Big Game Flu' from destroying the team's morale this year.

How do we prevent or stop the 'Big Game Flu' from happening? I am not sure; especially at the high school level. By the time our kids get 14 or 15, many of their mindsets are already so deeply established that they are hard to change. How do you make a kid tougher? How do you make a kid grittier? How do you make a kid love the game more?

When someone can figure those things out, they should be able to bottle it up and write a few bestsellers that could change the world. Until then, we have to focus on creating the best cultures and environments possible that focus on growth mindset and connection.

Growth Mindset is the idea that we all have the ability to learn, grow and do hard things with practice over time. The leader of the growth mindset movement, Carol Dweck, has said that we can increase character traits, like grit, through awareness, teaching, and timely feedback. Her studies have shown that people of all ages can learn how to overcome the 'Big Game Flu,' and other hurtful habits and illness.

Don't Judge, Teach
To prevent the 'Big Game Flu' and similar illnesses, we have to teach, not judge. Athletes with a fixed mindset, a mindset where they think they are who they are and that they can't get any better, feel like their traits are being measured and judged all the time. Instead of judging, teach. Treat everything like it is a learning process. It is okay to get the 'Big Game Flu.' Many people get the 'Big Game Flu.' Don't judge anyone for getting the 'Big Game Flu.' Teach them how to prevent it and overcome it. Help them learn better skills for getting over the 'Big Game Flu' like understanding that one game is just one game, and the lessons and experiences from that game can be used for the rest of their lives. 

Of course, we want to win games; but more importantly - we want to win in life by helping our athletes become great people. Becoming a great person requires learning that the 'Big Game Flu' is real and okay, but also teaching how to overcome the 'Big Game Flu.'

The great teachers believe in the growth of intellect and talent of all of their students, and they are fascinated with the process of learning.

Create the Right Environment
Carol Dweck says that great teachers set high standards for all their students. They establish, on Day One, an atmosphere of high expectations and genuine affection and concern. We won't love everyone we coach, but we must care about everyone we coach and believe in their ability to learn and grow. They put their athletes in the frame of mind where they can do their best. 

Few coaches can actually get their athletes to their ultimate potential by challenging their athletes while making sure that they feel cared about. That is why the 'Big Game Flu' sweeps through so many teams. Growth-minded coaches tell the truth and their athletes are able to receive it because they know their coaches care and because the coaches give them the tools needed to close gaps and grow.

Full Preparation and Full Effort
Success comes when we apply ourselves each day to becoming a little better. When you apply yourself to become a little better every day, over a period of time, you will become a lot better. There is no such thing as a mistake-free game. When we expect mistake-free games and judge our players off of their mistakes, it can create a toxic environment where the 'Big Game Flu' loves to live. 

Be tough and demanding. Have high expectations and hold people accountable. Do not tolerate less than their best. But making it about love and effort knowing that mistakes and losing is a part of life can help keep the 'Big Game Flu' away from your locker room.

Love What You Do
The best thing that you can do for anybody is to be a good example. Love who you are, love what you do, and love who you do it with. You won't always like everything about yourself, what you do, and who you do it with, but love is deeper than like.

The human experience is full of trials and tribulations that we have to learn how to navigate and overcome, but with a growth mindset, with time, and with effort, we can learn to live with and through love. That love is contagious. If we don't love it, it will be hard for them to love it. We have to model the love and actions that we want to see from our athletes. Be the example that you want to see by showing up every day, no matter the circumstances, with love, energy, and enthusiasm.