Thursday, February 17, 2022

Your Inner Circle


Motivational speaker Jim Rohn once said that we are the average of the five people we spend the most time with.

Research shows that our relationships are the greatest indicator of success, well-being, and happiness.

The strengths of our relationship are a greater success indicator than wealth and fame. People who are deeply connected to someone or to a group or community but have unhealthy habits (like smoking and alcohol) consistently outlive people who have extremely healthy habits but are not relationally connected to any group.

The quality of your life is always going to be a direct reflection of the quality of your relationships.

We are all born with the need for relationships and strong social connections. Great relationships help us feel happier, more hopeful, and healthier.

Who are you connected to? I heard a preacher once say that the life and relationships of Jesus are a great example of the relationships we should seek.


Everywhere Jesus went, large crowds followed. By the end of Jesus's life, there were about 120 people who walked around with him. This is called His Outer Circle of Care. These are the people he cared for, blessed, fed, served, and healed. Many of these people were unbelieving people that Jesus was trying to bring into the Kingdom of God.

You will probably have between 100-120 people in your life that you know and that you care about. You hope that good things happen to them.

But Jesus had 12 disciples with whom he worked closely. These 12 apostles were in Jesus's Circle of Influence. They followed Him and wanted to have their lives conformed to the image of Christ. These are the people who were greatly helped by Jesus and who helped Jesus.

At any point in our lives, we have 10-12 people who we call friends. We influence each other, so these people need to be people who are going to help you become the person you want to become and live the life you want to live. They need to be positive influences on who you are and what you do. They need to bring value, not take value. They need to deposit into you and in your life and not take away from you.

Among Jesus's 12 disciples, there were only 3 that were in His Inner Circle of Intimacy. Peter, James, and John went with Jesus wherever He went. They were with Jesus in the Garden of Gethesmane and saw Jesus pray so hard that He sweat blood. They saw all of Jesus, all of His heart, and everything about Him. Nothing was hidden from them.

In your life, there are 3 to 5 people that you will let in this closely. There are 3 to 5 people that you let in your life at the deepest levels, and these 3 to 5 people will directly affect who you are, what you do, and the life you live.

We all have something in life that we want to become. The people in our Inner Circle of Intimacy will affect the trajectory of our lives more than anything else, so make sure that those 3 to 5 people share your values and will hold you accountable to your values.

Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm. 

Whoever walks with successful people will become successful.

Whoever walks with people who make excuses and live with a victim mentality becomes someone who makes excuses and lives with a victim mentality.

Whoever walks with people who have a winner's mentality and find a way to win becomes someone who has a winner's mentality and finds a way to win.

Whoever walks with winners becomes a winner.

The number one way to change your life is to decide to change the people you spend the most time with.

You are one great relationship and community away from changing your life forever. Change your community, and you can change your life.



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